I don’t want to do this anymore!
I don’t want to feel this way anymore!
I don’t want to be on everyone’s mind all the time!
I don’t want to need dinners brought by!
I don’t want to need all these hugs!
I am grateful for all of it. It is helping tremendously. I just want to stop being me for one day. Just one fucking day.
I need a break from my grieving heart, and it just won’t let up.
People tell me I will get through it. THROUGH? Is there a light at the end of this tunnel? It will change. It won’t be so raw. I will eventually stop grieving this hard. He will always be dead and I will always love him. Even if someday I somehow find love again, I will always love him.
There is no through.